My sister and I were recently going over how we wish things were different. Different in jobs. Different in addresses. Different in societal standing. Just different.
Things have not worked out the way we had envisioned for our little families. At least not right now. Maybe one day things will change. But, for now, it’s not how we want it.
Then my sister said “Well, I have it better than some I know. One girl I know couldn’t afford Christmas gifts for her boys. She gradually took some of their toys and hid them so that they could open “new” toys for Christmas.”
Tears filled my eyes and shame hit me hard.
I have nothing to complain about. Yet, I so often do.
I often lament that I am unable to be a stay-at-home mom. My dream was never to work full time and leave my child at the babysitter’s from 8-4.
But, I have a job while some do not.
I am blessed.
There are times I even feel like a lesser mom, knowing I do not make organic, Paleo, sugar/gluten/dairy-free treats for my child.
But, we have nutritious food (and some not-so-nutritious) to fill our bellies and ward off hunger.
I am Blessed.
I see pictures of Christmas trees with tons of presents or Instagrammed pictures of the toys that moms and dads are eagerly wrapping for their child to open. I think, “Man! If I just had a bit more money! I could get her one of those as well!” (As if she needs more to clutter her little room.)
But, I had money to buy new toys and the underside of our Christmas tree is brimming with boxes and bows.
I am BLESSED.
I am easily discontented when my home is not as decorated or cute as a Better Homes and Gardens magazine spread – or when it doesn’t look like those I follow on Instagram or Facebook.
But, my home is furnished, warm, and full of love.
I Am BLESSED.
I whine that I am not able to do the Pinterest-y things I pin with my daughter or for my house all the time. I have even allowed Pinterest to make me feel like I’m not one of the “good” moms because I don’t have sensory play, themed playrooms, or because my daughter doesn’t like to wear those ridiculously huge, but very cute, boutique headbands.
But, my daughter loves me.
I AM BLESSED.
I am often consumed with envy and discontent on the materialistic things. It’s all about what I WANT, not what I NEED. I allow social media and the things I spend money on to dictate who I am.
But, oh, how I often miss the point. How I often miss the ways that I am blessed beyond measure.
I may not have the picture perfect home, the magazine worthy Christmas tree, or a wardrobe to make Kate Middleton envious, but…
I have a husband who works hard, loves his child, and loves his wife.
I have a gorgeous daughter that I adore and who adores me.
I have friends, family, food, and shelter.
I have more than some could ever dream.
I AM BLESSED.